Friday, August 10, 2007
♥ 5:40 PM
I studied a little today!
I feel accomplished!(:
Anyways. I feel very very very very very very very very very excited about 2ndNOV and everything. But I'm super super super scared also. I'm so afraid that it's been the wrong choice all along and that I won't enjoy it as much. I'm so afraid that what I'm seeing now, is what I'll feel next year. And I'm so afraid that it'll be worse than last year. But its your attitude that defines your altitude and destiny. So I'm going to keep brainwashing myself(even if it isn't all that effective) and I'm going to keep being positive. Like during all the numerous competitions, when all the longDs had our positive attitude. :D!
I'm hoping that I'll still feel God and still bring him into my life everyday to be a motivation to go on and see him guide me and help me through life's trials and tribulations. I'm so worried that everything will change and that I won't even see him in life anymore. I'm hoping that life won't be meaningless then. Because I don't think I would feel like I'd have made the right choice. And I hope, that I won't feel sick and tired of doing whatever I do everyday. And I pray with all my heart that I don't go to school everyday just to heal the wounds that some people have made on others because of me. After so long, I still wonder. Yes, take a leap of faith. Take the risk. Know what you're missing out. Or, see your mistake and your shortcomings. Its brave and dangerous and to certain extends stupid. But this is all I wanted right? Isn't it? I'm not sure anymore. But I know that since I've come this far and so much has happened. I'm winging it. Sticking with it till the end. My choice, I'll pay the consequences. I know God won't do it for me all the time. We're here to learn. I'm still afraid. But I'll do my best. And I'll live my life well.
All for you Lord, All for you. I'll do my best.Everything for your glory, everything for your praise.Let me be what I'm meant to be and let it be the right path I choose. Let me live my life for you, Lord. Let me be what you stand for. Your will, and not mine be done. Use me, Lord. "take it from my hands, cause I can't do this on my own"jaime.
&when will you take me away on a balloon?
