Sunday, June 10, 2007
♥ 3:00 PM
I'm going for holiday next week.Hurray.
I sense a lack of enthusiasm. I meant, I sense a serious lack of enthusiasm.
Tell me why.
Cause its going to be hell ENJOYING nagging from my mother and twice that amount from an attention seeking old lady.Greeeat, just great.
Something tells me, its going to be a 6 day torture. 6 days, bloody hell. 6 days is very very long. We NEVER ever go for that long. It's too long! What happened to the need to train very hard. And to think I was supposed to sacrifice camp! Camp's supposed to be the HIGHLIGHT of my holidays. I really don't care if I have an extremely dissatisfactory group. Oh man. 6 days of torture, as if the 8 days weren't enough. Why couldn't my interview or something of great importance be during that period? WHY! I'd much rather stayed glued to Singapore and get tortured mercilessly by Coach through horrible training schedules. Even Mrs Jeya's schedules are fine. Why! I really don't want to go. Thailand,
again. I've been there twice in the pass year. Too often. too often. Now, I really don't enjoy holidays. I used to be sooo excited by them. But going alone, gosh its a chore. No computer, no phone and no friends. To add on, I can't train properly. Meaning, I've got to say bye bye to nationals now. Hmph! My priorities are so simple, and yet, my parents say they're all wrong. Greeaat. Be a super spiritually weak person. I'm fine with not getting anything I want and distancing myself from God. I'm totally fine with that. And I'll get struck by lightning the moment I step into the sun. Nice. Really, Nice.
I'm making sacrifices alright! I'm breaking camp for training. As if that's not enough. I'd fly back for training, but I guess, that's really no option. 6 days of torture in a land that I've been to so recently. I pray that I get into my dream school. I pray that they'll send me overseas during the June hols. And I pray that thanks to that, I don't have to be tortured no more. Oh please, I want to gain entry! Its been my dream for so long. Its the longest time I've been wanting something. And I'm actually working for it. Sort of, at least. Oh please, oh please. I'll pray harder than ever, I want it badly. I really do. Believe me. I really do. I'd give up camp for it, if its what I have to do. And you know how much camp means to me. Oh mans.
And I'd like to say that I'd really really really appreciate it if I gain entry into the school of my dreams through the Integrated Programme. If you know me well, you'd know how much I really want it. You'd know what I'd do for it. And I'd like to think I deserve it too. But maybe not. Maybe people are working even harder out there. You really wouldn't know. Hmph.
I wish my parents would trust me more. I wish they'd grant me more independence. I wish they'd trust my judgement and they'd respect my priorities. I wish they'd use their common sense. Would you rather have a younger person leading your child, or one who smokes and influences people in a bad way. I'd leave it to you. But you should think about whether you're just restricting my joy and taking it all away. Thanks, I love the (absent) support. Thanks. I appreciate it. And, I absolutely love the nagging.
Not. I think I've been disobedient recently. I wouldn't blame God for not giving my all time favourite birthday present. I'm annoyed with too many things. I wish it'd all go away. And, I wish I'd get my ideal perfect birthday present,
soo badly. And lastly, to lessen the torture, I'm wishing for a last goodbye.
"The only treasure I seek"
jaime.
&when will you take me away on a balloon?
